The following comes from a letter to my coordinator concerning my living situation in the quaint Kyrgyz Republic village, Kara-Oi:
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Dear Saltanat.
I have some grievences with my family. I am getting frustrated to the point of thinking that it might be better for me to move out of my house and find something new. I have organized my thoughts into the following categories:
Money and grants (for the family)
My older brother, Ruslan, asked me first for money and, then, for vodka when he was drunk. I explained to him that I am a volunteer and don't have money. He hasn't asked for anything since, but I don't appreciate his hounding me. My family, this morning, asked me to borrow 2000 soms in front of the entire rest of the family after breakfast. I think that the situation that the put me in was rude, and I don't think that they understand that I do not have $50 to lend them. My mother last night (at 930PM) said that I need to write a grant for the family to convert their newly acquired farm into a craft factory from which the family would benefit. I explained that grants need to involve the larger community and that I have a lot of other work. It didn't seem to penetrate her ideas about what I'm doing here.
Bathing, clothes washing, telephone, and food
We are not bathing regularly. I think that my little brothers have scabies. They have bites all over their hands and stomachs. I have seen my brother applying medication to his sons. (I reported this to medical.) I have only had one bath in the last month at the house, and I need to bathe due to my recovering skin condition. It got to the point where I had to wash my clothes at Roselle's house. My family thought that this was rude and extreme. Some of my food, a head of cabbage, also disappeared while I was in Bishkek. I told them that if they need food to ask me first and that I will probably be able to spare some food. I don't understand why I am paying them for food if they are taking my food. I fully paid my portion of the phone bill, but they have the phone restricted ("locked"), so I have to ask them to use the phone. When I came home from Bishkek for the medical visit, I had to pay Ruslan 30 som to drive to Cholpon-Ata to make a call because our phone was locked.
Privacy and noise
I am not able to relax in the house, I feel. I am constantly being bothered by the children to learn English or translate from Kyrgyz into English. The radio is constantly loudly playing outside my room from about 8-9AM on. I have no space to practice my yoga under these circumstances, morning or night. I have no way to manage my stress in this noisy claustrophobic environment. There is no sense of a quiet time in the house. I have been kept up until 12AM by children and music a number of times. I feel like my parents are trying to monitor my life by constantly criticizing where I am going and what I am doing. They always want to know how much I am working; I feel like they are my bosses not my landlords. I feel like I am 14 years old again. We also have a problem with mice in the house. I have seen mice twice. Once, this morning, a mouse was running around my room in the daylight. Furthermore, my father tells me that "God doesn't like that," when I do things that he himself doesn't like. I don't appreciate the way that he uses his religion against me in the house. I am still learning cultural differences and trying very hard. It is frankly embarassing.
I think that my family either has failed to listen or needs to have certain things recommunicated to them. With all of the stress and problems outside of the house, I need to be able to come home to a healthier environment. I know that there must be other options available to me in the community if they are unwilling to make any changes for me. I have tried to communicate to them without trying to offend them, but I am at my wits end. Maybe I am not cut out for this type of huge family. I feel like something needs to change.
I hope that you can understand where I am coming from and that you realize how much I have been thinking about this. Even if you don't know what to do, I needed to tell you what's going on. Thank you.
Michael Jacobs
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I guess that I might be ready for a new family. I have concluded from my string of bad living situations that I must have been a terrible roommate during a past life and that I am now meant to reconcile these karmic forces in the Peace Corps in Kyrgyzstan. Furthermore I can't stand small children right now. If I hear anymore bad Central Asian pop while doing my kriyas, I will flip my shit. Love. -MJ
